Worried about your daughter becoming Big Sis? As a new mother to two, welcoming a second bundle of joy into the family is an exciting yet challenging journey. One of the key aspects is preparing your firstborn for the big sister role. While Stella has only been ‘Big Sis’ for four months, and we’re continuing to support her in figuring out this new role; I’m reflecting on some of the successful preparation practices we implemented with Stella in the weeks leading up to Graham’s arrival. Stella was 14 months when I became pregnant, and 23 months old when Graham arrived. This was very a tricky age to navigate preparing for such a big change. With that said, Taylor and I are pleased with how we prepped Stella for becoming Big Sis as we’ve enjoyed watching her healthy relationship with Graham blossom. Here are 20 heartwarming ways to ensure your daughter is ready and excited about becoming Big Sis.
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20 Ways to Prepare your Daughter for Becoming Big Sis
- Talk about Baby: Use the new baby’s name every day in conversation with your daughter. Bring the baby to life for your daughter by showing her ultrasound images. Explain how the baby is growing and the incredible role she’ll have as a big sister. Share stories of her infancy, making her feel special and important. Highlight the love and joy she brought into the family, reinforcing the idea that the new baby will do the same.
- Familiarize Big Sis with Baby Gear: Install baby’s car seat in the car that your daughter primarily rides in. Lay out the infant bouncer, the nursing pillow, the burp cloths. Becoming Big Sis means welcoming lots of new stuff into her space!
- Big Sis the Builder: Involve Big Sis in the assembly of baby’s crib or bassinet. Place the crib in Big Sis’s room, even if baby won’t be sleeping in their room once they arrive.
- Extra hands on your bump: Get Big Sis’s hands on your belly every time baby kicks! In the same way that the sensation of fetal movement helps Mom realize the living being growing inside them, your daughter will understand the ongoing growth if they feel baby’s movement too.
- Bump Butter buddy: Allow Big Sis to apply oil/lotion to Mom’s bump. This can be added to Big Sis’s bedtime routine.
- Sibling Play: Encourage Big Sis to read a book or sing a song to your baby bump. Becoming Big Sis means she has a built in best friend to play with!
- A Bedtime Song: Pick a bedtime song that you’ll sing to Baby, and start singing this song to Big Sis before Baby’s arrival.
- Gift from Big Sis to New Baby: Take Big Sis shopping for a gift she can give to Baby when they meet in the hospital.
- Distraction from Nursing: Designate an alternative beverage or snack that Big Sis can have when you are nursing Baby. As I am continuing to breastfeed both Stella and Graham, when Stella would become jealous that I was nursing Graham instead of her, I would quickly prep a small serving of Crystal Lite lemonade. This was, and still is, exciting to Stella. Its something Graham can’t have, and it’s a sugar free, easy prepped beverage that I’m okay with.
- Involve Dad: Have Dad pick out activities he can do with Big Sis while Mom is spending lots of time with Baby in the first few weeks. As Graham was born in July, Taylor set up a new splash pad and new slip-n-slide for he and Stella to play with outdoors while I was with Graham.
- How Many Days til Baby: Set up a Countdown Calendar with stickers for Big Sis to countdown the days til Baby’s Due Date. Think like an Advent calendar counting down til Christmas.
- Daily Rewards: Collect small trinkets you can gift daily to Big Sis each morning for the first 2 weeks of baby being home. My Mom (Stella’s Mimi) did this when Graham was born, she had a gift for Stella each time she’d see her. The last thing Big Sis wants is to be pushed to the side when family gush over the new baby.
- Create a Special Bond: Brainstorm an activity for Mom and Big Sis to do during Baby’s nap times. Stella and I baked muffins, made pancakes, or some fun breakfast item, during Graham’s first nap of the day.
- Birth Prep: Include Big Sis in any labor stretching or positions you’re doing in preparation for birth. Stella loved rolling on my birth ball, and doing Cat Cow stretches with me while I was in labor at home.
- Postpartum Recovery: Enlist Big Sis’s help gathering all your postpartum supplies. Mom’s of toddler’s know there is no privacy in the bathroom! Stella quickly jumped on the opportunity to grab me a Pad or an ice pack when she saw me in the bathroom in the first few days/weeks postpartum.
- Big Sis Sleepover: Consider scheduling a practice sleepover at the location Big Sis will sleep at while Mom and Dad are in the hospital for Baby’s birth.
- Transition Narrative Books: Read Big Sister books that tell a narrative about the exact transition your daughter is about to experience. Choose age-appropriate stories that showcase the positive aspects of sibling relationships, making her feel excited about the new addition. We still read this one every day, and we brought this one from Wonderbly to the hospital for Stella and Graham to read together when they met for the first time.
- Big Sis’s Baby Doll: Grab Big Sis’s favorite baby doll, and pretend to breastfeed baby or give baby a bottle. Then, encourage Big Sis to burp the baby doll. This way, when you’re actually feeding baby, Big Sis can do the same with their doll. This involvement fosters a sense of responsibility and anticipation. Additionally, encourage gentle hands with baby doll. Demonstrate gentle touches and interactions with dolls or stuffed animals, helping her understand how to handle the baby safely.
- Designate Special Duties: Enlist Big Sis’s help with baby’s laundry. You can make a game out of sorting Big and Small. Or sorting Pink from Blue, if you’re expecting a Boy!
- Establish New Routines: At bedtime, put Big Sis’s baby doll to bed. This will prep Big Sis for when you’re putting baby to bed.
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Final Thoughts
Navigating the first four months of parenting two children, Stella and Graham, has been an exhilarating yet exhausting ride. The sleepless nights, constant demands, and the delicate balance required to meet the needs of both my newborn and my toddler have pushed me to new limits. However, amidst the chaos, witnessing the blossoming sibling relationship has been an indescribable source of beauty and joy, making every challenging moment utterly worthwhile. It won’t ever be perfect, and there is no sure formula for preparing your daughter for becoming Big Sis. Nonetheless, I hope these preparation methods can help you in the way they did our family.
As you prepare for the arrival of your second bundle of joy, remember that the love in your family will only grow. Have open conversations about the changes that will happen. Acknowledge her feelings and reassure her that her place in the family is irreplaceable. By incorporating these 20 heartwarming ways to prepare your daughter for becoming Big Sis, you’re not just expanding your family; you’re enriching the bonds that make it truly special. Embrace the journey, and savor the moments as your family evolves into a beautiful ensemble of love and laughter.
Photos by Meggy Weggy Photography, 2023. This blog post contains affiliate links via RewardStyle. By shopping these links, you are supporting New Cotton Blend at no additional cost to you . Please note that I only recommend products that I personally use; and I always have my readers’ best interest at heart.
